Robert (gurdonark) wrote,

binding and the truth

Today the copy shop is finishing the binding on briefs I must federal express today. At first, I thought I'd have to tape bind them myself, as the kind woman at the shop was personnning the copy shop by herself, though she had work enough for three. I copied my covers and my documents, but then she got free to help do the binding itself. That's a good thing, as I prefer comb bindings to doing my own tape bindings. I need to get a fallback binding machine, as I do not think I kept my little vello binder that I used to keep for personal purposes. Now I'm waiting for her to finish, so that I can run to Federal Express.

In the meantime, here are the answers to my recent "Gurdonark Poll". Everyone did very well in guessing the answers, which confirms to me that I am not nearly mysterious enough in any way:

1. I won the FFA "junior farmer gold ribbon" award at the Clark County Fair for the best long-haired goat, which I raised outside town at a friend's.

False! But I love goats. My grandfather used to keep them on his little hobby farm. Yet, I'm willing to eat cabrito, which thought inspires in me a "why am I a carnivore" thought.

2. I won the cartoon competition in the newspaper by captioning a surly luncheonette sketch with the slogan "I haven't served you yet".

True! The sign said "Service with a smile", and when I was 8 years old, the Arkansas Gazette paid me 5 dollars for winning the "What's Your Line?" contest.

3. I was born on an Air Force base.

True! Lackland Air Force Base in San Antonio, Texas. I was a military brat until age 4. Oh, the trauma of changing locales 4 times by the age of 4.

4. I turned down a chance to go to Harvard so that I could go to the University of Arkansas.

False!, but I did turn down a chance to go to Southern Arkansas University.
I did get a tuition scholarship to Arkansas, which paid a whole semester's tuition--a whopping two hundred dollars.

5. I finished in the top five percent of my class in law school.

True! I finished 5 out of 120, which qualifies. I used to think I finished 3rd, but then I found out two folks in the night class passed me.

6. I have one brother and one sister.

True! Both younger--my brother by a mere 13 months and my sister by five years.

7. I went to law school to cause my father to lose a bet.

True! He bet my mother that I would thwart his hopes and go to graduate school to study English. I had fun when I wrote the post about that story.

8. I appeared on television as a 12 year old, singing songs from "The King and I", while dressed as a faux Thai child.

True! Hair dye right out of a bottle, like shoe polish, and a little round cap that looked rather like a really cool Victorian garter.

9. I built a computer in college.

True! A required course in the physics department was Electronics, a six hour course that everyone took for semesters on end, self-study-ish, in which the crowning achievement was to build a little Heathkit analog computer, all Radio-shacky!

10. I flunked a basic COBOL programming class in college.

True! I took this course between college and law school, to kill time after I got burned out on shoveling fly ash at a utility company. I had a C at the drop date, but instead of converting it to 'audit', I promptly kept the course and failed it, the same summer session I got an "A" in Shakespeare in a class with a woman who turned out to be one of my favorite friends in law school.

11. My wife is ten years younger than I am.

False! She is one year younger than I am, but far more charming.

12. I am vice president of the Garland Bar Association.

True! It's my one foray into "official titles" right now, other than Founder, Feeder Guppy Rescue League. My chief duty as VP (the number 3 job) was to run the Christmas Party.

13. I used to be a section leader of a forum on Compuserve.

True! I was business and science section leader of the California Forum.

14. I am the secretary/treasurer of our neighborhood homeowners' association.

False! I don't have time for that, though it would be fun.

15. I wrote a novel during the National novel writing month in 2002.

True! It took me 10 days, resulting in the novel, "Lonely Distance".

16. I am estranged from my last surviving grandparent.

False! I lost my last grandparent nearly ten years ago.

17. I am adopted.

False! I look just like my father did at 45, except he had a cool moustache.

18. The secret luxury I own about which I never journal is my MGB roadster. I hate the idea of seeming "rich" enough to have a fun car.

False! But wouldn't I be cool if I did have an MGB? They're not really very expensive, but I don't have the space or inclination to visit the UK car repair shop.

19. asphalteden and I are third cousins

False! But he is so hip I'd be lucky if he were my cousin!

20. When I was four, I won the Little Mr. South Arkansas pageant, because my parents put more change in the charity jar by my picture than the other parents did.

False! But my sister at age 6 or so won a little miss something or other contest on just this basis!

I'll tabulate the winner(s) on tomorrow!

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