December 30th, 2014

dark flower

recalling the diarist's past

Tonight I read old weblog posts from years ago. I found posts I well remembered writing. I found posts about things I had previously forgotten. Some posts received no comments from readers. Some posts received lots of comments. Comment have different associations for me. Some comments were from people I still stay in contact with today, either within or in contexts outside ths journal. Some comments were from people with whom I am not in contact. Some of those folks disappeared from my "view".

A soul or two departed after a bit of that inexplicable thing called Livejournal Drama. I remember in 2002 or so one fellow unfriended lots of people but left a public post that said "You're no longer riding the [User's name] train!". I like, too, the time that someone defriended me and I did not realize for weeks, when I went to comment to a post and could not. You'd think I would have realized earlier, because I commented so often that it would be like having my air cut off.But that particular poster did not post so often. On the other hand, I am in contact with
many people who no longer participate in LiveJournal but whom I know in other social media.

I saw old posts about nature hikes planned, concerts seen and even a surgery experienced. I read a few posts by another soul or two. I now use Twitter and Facebook as extensively as LiveJournal. Each has its virtues. Both lack the relaxed
essay-centric feel of LiveJournal at its best.

In the years since 2002, I have read of marriages contracted and dissolved, babies born and children grown tall, people who pass on from this life, Ph.D.'s awarded (indeed, I did not know there was such a high ratio of Ph.D.'s in the population until LiveJournal), cities visited, cities departed, and cities settled into forever. I've read of lots of pets, a dollop of disfavored bosses, and of a diverse cast of characters in enthusiastic prose about love in bloom and love in wilt.

I thought today of how time has passed. I am perhaps in the last five or ten years of litigating cases. My parents are both gone, as are my last two surviving grandparents. I've lost a nephew taken far too young, aunts and uncles, and an old friend, all passed beyond this life.

I still like LiveJournal,even if the days of dozens of comments are gone. I like seeing who I was, even though I am the same as who I am. I lack the narcissist gene, but I like have extra diarist chromosomes. It runs in my family.

I'm grateful to all the people I have met via LiveJournal and, for that matter, in all social media. What a grand gift connection can be, as it has proven for me.